i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Im just a social blackout drinker.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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