Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
