So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
