Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize
