I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Randomize
