I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Randomize
