I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Randomize
