if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize
