Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
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