the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Randomize
