i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
