ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Randomize
