Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
