That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
Vodka?
Forever.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
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