no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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