After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
