Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
