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• (206): View more from Washington

  I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole

  (425): View more from Washington

  There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian

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• (314): View more from Missouri

  Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl

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• (512): View more from Texas

  Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.

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• (720): View more from Colorado

  Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation

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• (904): View more from Florida

  taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport

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• (240): View more from Maryland

  stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.

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• (607): View more from New York

  do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand

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• (954): View more from Florida

  i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how

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• (587): View more from Alberta

  Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  He asked if I wanted to "hang out"

  (410): View more from Maryland

  A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back

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• (989): View more from Michigan

  Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.

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• (055): View more from

  Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore

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• (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome

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• (868): View more from Trinidad and Tobago-Carib

  Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...

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