so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
