They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize