I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
