i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
