Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
