Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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