D3 body, D1 cock
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
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