do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
