SEEEEXXX PLEASE
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
