I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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