Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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