Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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