I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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