Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I showed him my bush... on skype.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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