why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Even the bartender felt bad for me
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
This toilet bowl is my home.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
