That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Randomize