that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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