is wine microwaveable?
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Randomize
