is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Randomize
