i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
