U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize