You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
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