Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
