i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
Randomize
