Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
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