My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
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