He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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