That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
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