Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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