drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Randomize
