He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Randomize
