Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
