It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
