My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
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