hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
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